Music - my love

People write for a variety of reasons. Some write to cover an overwhelming sense of inadequacy. If inadequacy is the illness, then publication is the cure, but only temporary. Others write to feed an addiction and publication is a temporary fix. Some people are natural-born story tellers and writing is the way they tell their stories. A few writers have something important to say – some universal truth to convey – some great questions to answer. I never imagined that I fit into that category until recently, when I discovered the answer to a question that has forever plagued me: what is love?

For me the answer is simple. Music is love. I met music, my one true love, in my fourth grade, and I have loved her ever since. By my sixth grade, we were going steady. I was practicing every morning and evening. Seeing this dedication and involvement, my aunt gifted me a sruti box, designed for children of my age.

In the summers, I got up early and continued practicing. I used to listen to lots of concerts along with my grandfather in his black radio. Occasionally, amidst much static, I could pick up the local AM/FM channels when tuned to a particular frequency. I remember listening to Dr.Chandrasekar’s violin concert, and carnatic vocal recital by Bombay sisters, Bombay Jayashri, Unnikrishnan, late Sri Maharajapuram Santhanam, Maharajapuram Ramachandran, Tiruchur Ramachandran, O S Thyagarajan, Sudha Raghunathan, Sowmya, and many others... Also, in those hot, un-air-conditioned summers of my youth, my mother often walked miles with me to town so that I could attend some live ticketed concerts in famous sabhas. I attended lots of live concerts with my beloved mother in those long, hot, seemingly endless summers.

Soon I realized that I was in love like most young people in love, but with music. I read various books related to music, to understand her various forms, her origin and her history. I, of course continued to listen to my radio. I regularly purchased new cassettes which had my favorite songs and ragas, and eventually it has become another source of information and fascination.

I continued my romance with music through high school and college. When I returned home after college, I discovered that my sruti box stopped working due to dust. I wasn’t angry for that, but I felt uneasy about my relationship with music. Would she forgive me for losing those tokens of love?

There are so many people like me who depend on music for companionship and entertainment. Music and I never married, but we have never fallen out of love. She has always been with me and will continue her stay with me, until I am there for her.